Setting: The CEC kitchen on Wednesday night during dinner. The Husband gets home around 6:10 with dinner on the table, ready to be served. It’s been a long day.
Husband: Hi honey, how was your day?
CEC: Long. Tiring. I’m exhausted.
Husband: I’m exhausted too. This job I’m doing has me up and down on my feet all day long. My back is killing me.
CEC: That is really horrible. I feel bad for you… kind of.
Husband: Yeah, well – work is work. What is this I’m eating here?
CEC: It’s chili. It’s been in the freezer since we had people over for your birthday.
Husband: It’s good. (notice the buttering up compliments)
CEC: Well, I’ll be sure to tell Aunt Debbie the next time I see her how much you like it since she was the one who made it.
(Dinner continues for the next 10-15 minutes where CEC and the Husband continue to discuss their days.)
Husband: Gosh.. I am soo tired. All I want to do is take a shower and go lay on the couch.
CEC: You’re telling me. That’s all I want to do too – except I still have to make lunches too.
CEC gets up from the table since they are both done eating and ready to clean everything up. The Husband continues to stall while sitting at the kitchen table taking a swig of beer every minutes or so.)
Husband: Man, I can’t wait to get comfortable on that couch.
CEC: Well, you better get your butt in gear because you have to help me with these dishes first.
Husband: Uggghhh – do I have to?
CEC: Um, yes.
Husband: But I really don’t want to do the dishes today.
CEC: Yes dear, well we all do things we don’t want to do each and every day now don’t we? I was hoping your dinner would make itself but that didn’t happen.
Husband: Can’t I get a pass from doing the dishes tonight?
CEC: No.
Husband: How about we make a deal?
CEC: (looks suspicious) What kind of… deal?
Husband: If you do the dishes tonight, I’ll give you all the money I have in my wallet.
CEC: Well that is going to depend on how much money is in your wallet.
Husband: (looks through wallet) I have $7.
CEC: (thinks it over for about .5 seconds) Do you know what that $7 means to me?
Husband: Um, that your husband doesn’t have to do the dishes tonight?
CEC: No, $7 means THREE DAYS of Starbuck’s coffee!
Husband: So is that a yes?
CEC: Go get cozy – I’m doing the dishes tonight.
Husband: Whoever said that you can’t buy your wife off wasn’t doing it right.
CEC: “… can’t buy me looo-ove. can’t buy me looo-ove.” (true story.)
Husband: (puts money on table) I’m running while I still can.
For other tales from my marriage, you can read the following posts:
Question: What would you have done with my $7?
{ 47 comments… read them below or add one }
Love your blog. At least you got $7. My husband weasels out of cleaning all the time or worse he leaves dishes in the sink (what does that do?).
I despise dishes so much, I’m not sure $7 would’ve done it for me!
lol…totally would have done it for $5 even! That’s alot of trys at the claw machine outside Walmart.
This is awesome! I would have taken the $7 too!
It’s sorta like those commercials for what would you do for a klondike bar…
Exactly. I wouldn’t do much for a klondike bar unfortunately.
Hahah I love it - I would totally barter chores for moolah! Seven bucks is *almost* the price of a new OPI polish from Target - ya know, gotta keep those hands pretty after subjecting them to that sudsy dishwater!
That’s right!
That is one heck of a deal! — I knew exactly where you were going with that $7 too! I could see the handwriting on the wall
….I’d be thinking the same thing!
Enjoy your coffee
AHAHAHAHAHA!!! I will do anything for money! I love hearing the FIRST thing that comes to mind when you have a little extra cash! You two are my favorite!
Haha! This little dialogue cracks me up. I would totally be at Starbucks with my $7 too!
hahaha what a funny story! I would totally take the $7! Plus, dishes is probably my favorite/least-taxing chore. I’m hoping that I can someday arrange for my future-husband to do all of the laundry and I’ll do all of the dishes.
Good luck with that one. Let me know how it works out.
Hahaha we had the same dirty-dished debacle last night. Neither of us wanted to clean. I didn’t get $7 though..
You need to barter better.
I think Joey and I would both represent your husband in this conversation. Neither of us like doing the dishes. If there’s not a crazy amount we often leave them… for me to do in the morning. Hey, that doesn’t sound fair! $7 would almost buy me half a yoga class…
Too funny! I’m so jealous you get paid to do your dinner dishes. Or get help. I make a mess all by myself, then get to clean it up solo too!
Believe you me - it only happens once every… 15 months.
Too fun! I love little stories into your life like this.
ahaha. um, so worth it. well played, Chels. well played.
I would be takin’ that $7 for coffee, too. that, or a new bottle of OPI.
I would have this convo with my man too, BUT the roles would be reversed! AND I don’t even have the $7 to spare but hate dishes that much!
Great choice! I would’ve totally done the dishes I don’t mind it. I’d buy coffee for sure, nail polish, or probably food.
I hate doing the dishes because we don’t have a dishwasher!
Haha! I definetly would do the dishes for some dough! Anytime
Haha, I love you guys. Meeker and I always do things like that but we say “I’ll give you all the money in my bank account” - which is pointless seeing as how we have the same bank account.
I’d spend that $7 on a cheap shirt at Target. My favorites. Or clearance shoes at Target. I’d go to Target.
hahaha - I’ll have to try that one out on him!
Hahaha, I would have done the dishes for $7 too! Next time you should try to strike this deal with him right after he has hit up the bank machine.
I know. I have to be sneaky and look in the wallet beforehand.
I would have taken the money too! Not sure what I’d do with it… Honestly I’d end up sticking it in my wallet and just slowly spending it on things. So boring. But if I could go out and pick something right away - then frozen yogurt!
Hi Chelsea ~ I’m new here, but have loved reading some of your blog! Found it while searching for roasted almond recipes, and can hardly wait to try your cocoa roasted almonds!
Oh ~ and I would have used the $7 for the same EXACT thing! Can’t resist the green mermaid!
Hi Melanie! I hope you like the cocoa roasted almonds! THey’re awesome!
Smart move! I love these stories…so funny!!
Haha if the amount is under $10 then I totally think of it in terms of Starbucks denominations! lol
exactly the same thing!
Ha! Cute story
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Bahahahaha! I would have taken the $7 and spent it on fro yo, coffee, or a new pair of earrings. Maybe he will remember this and offer again next week, which means more starbucks for you!
Love it! Thanks for the laugh!
Hahaha! I would have bought $7 worth of special snack bars like larabars or simple bars or other expensive deliciousness…or a really good magazine
xyx
Hahaha! This is so great! I’m lucky, my boyfriend doesn’t even ask or try to get out of it anymore. He knows, if I cooked he’s cleaning! Money would be a GREAT way to get out of that though
Hahaha oh I love you. I totally would have taken those $7 too!
5 vegan chocolate chip cookies from Whole Foods’ bakery!
Haha! I love it!
I would have bought Starbucks as well!
Haha, you must not order a soy latte, because $7 would not cover 3 of those! I would have gotten coffee too, but it would only have covered 1/2 of my drinks
no - I either do an iced coffee or just a regular coffee with LOTS of soy!
I saw that $7 and immediately thought of a few cups of iced coffee, or a few runs to the FroYo store. Wish my hubby’d pay me for doing dishes. I’d be an amped-up fro-yo queen!
Haha, this made me chuckle!